Who Are You Gonna Call?

Whether you are a producer, writer or director, sooner or later your project needs the advice of an expert. Movies cost millions. Their development is much like the setup of a million-dollar business. So think of the expert as a business coach. Major decisions will indirectly impact on your business' bottom line. Any advice leading to those decisions will in some way or other contribute to the success or failure of your project, your slate, your career.

It all starts with that first draft.

You give it to a friend, because your friend likes you enough to sacrifice a couple of hours and help your future Hollywood career.

But unless that friend is a pro, how can you expect expert advise? Your friend may have never read a single screenplay, produced or unproduced.

McKee says: don't ask your friends to read your script, but to listen to your story summary, told over a coffee. Ten minutes, no more.

So how is that going to help you?

I'm not sure your friend will distinguish a wonderfully told screen story with engaging characters from something that is wildly imaginitive but plain wrong for the screen.

If your friend doesn't work in a creative position in the industry, will you get reliable career advise? I think not.

Honest advise you may get from a producer or an agent, even an experienced fellow writer. These people's businesses rely on stories that sell. You might ask a director or actor for their opinion, but - with all due respect - it will be less reliable.

If no working professional sacrifices their time to further your aspirations, don't despair. There is an army of script editors, screenplay consultants, story analysts etc. out there to help you.

Whether you like it or not, you are going to pay them.

DO YOU TRUST THIS PERSON?

If you are a first-time writer, you will need input on more than one draft and over the course of many months until your script is ready to go into the world and compete with already established writers.

If you are serious about breaking in and earning a buck, think hard about who you are giving your money to. Good advice can be costly.

But cheap advice can be far more costly.

Too many screenwriters make life-changing decisions based on advice given by their friends, peers or so-called experts. Because people are writers themselves or have web sites advertising their services, they are not necessarily qualified to decide over your future.

The type of collaboration you are entering into is so crucially important, you really need to do your research. Here are a number of questions to consider before you make a decision. And when I speak of (script) editor, I mean 'story or script consultant' in the broader sense.

1. What is the editor's vision on screenwriting?

If you believe real characters don't change and your consultant insists that you must have a character transformation, you are effectively on a different wave length. Check out the consultants' web sites. Does it show their vision on story and script development? Or is it full of marketing speak, flowery promises about bringing out your voice, adding to the local culture etc.? Ultimately you want to become a successful writer, earn money and build a career.

2. What is the editor's vision on script development?

Is it a 'snapshot person'? An experienced reader, specialised merely in providing script notes and assessments? Or is the focus on getting your script from its current draft to something that can be marketed or produced? Does the consultant's approach dig to the core of the story or does it only fiddle with format and style on the surface?

3. What is the script editor's taste for movies?

If yours is an edgy sci-fi with elements of raw graphic violence, your money will be wasted on the king of romantic comedy. Can you find a set of favourite movies you both know? Does the consultant have taste that is broad enough for a true professional?

4. Does the editor differentiate between story and script?

Story deals with plot, which is how most audiences will refer to your film. Script deals with the detailed expression of story on the scene level. Writing script notes takes time but is relatively simple (I'll give you a whole list of tips & tricks for free). When you choose your consultant, be aware of these two areas of expertise.

5. Does the script editor speak your language?

If you talk about story like Syd Field, in Plot Point One and Plot Point Two, things may get complicated when your consultant prefers Crossing the First and Second Threshold. Conversely, if your editor doesn't believe in The Hero's Journey, you have a good reason for concern . A good consultant knows most if not all story theories and establish a terminology that fits your taste and beliefs.

6. Has the script editor published anything?

Does the web site give you more than fees and contact details? Is there a blog? Does it express the type of advice you expect? Are the views expressed on the blog or web site original? Can you find an insight you haven't found anywhere else before, which makes total sense? Or does it all read like a collection of cut-and-paste jobs from Robert McKee or - worse - other web sites?

7. Does the script editor share your passion?

If they care about the craft, it will transpire through their writing. If they are passionate, they will want you to succeed. If they love movies, they will know examples from both mainstream and specialty cinema. If they want you to succeed, they will quote from successful movies and reference the principles that made those movies great.

8. Is the script editor predominantly a writer?

Writers may be able to find creative solutions. On the other hand, if you are dealing with a consultant who is primarily an artist, the worldview of that writer may transpire through the advice. Writers by definition try to tell their own story. And some have trouble suppressing the artist inside in order to put the client before the art. Better to work with someone who has a broader understanding of the whole industry.

9. Do credits and testimonials give you confidence?

Do testimonials give evidence of a sharp, constructive and creative insight? Or just a 'nice person'? In fairness, editors can't (always) be blamed for the failure of films. But if you find a list of failed films, the message may not be the right one. If you want to write for the cinema and credits are biased towards television, you may want to look further.

10. Does the editor offer the service you require?

If you are working on an early draft, you need feedback on the story. It would be a waste of your money (and everybody's time) to get detailed script notes on style, formatting, dialogue etc. Different stages call for different types of advice. Does the consultant offer you these options? Or are all options skewed towards 'script notes'?

FORMER H'WOOD EXEC WILL GET YOU MOVIE DEAL!

Recently I have heard three stories first-hand from writers who had been given poor advice by 'senior American development people', 'produced writers', 'published screenwriting teachers' etc.

One writer believed she got the deal of the century when a former studio executive offered a Reader's Report for less than $150. When the report arrived, the excitement faded rapidly: a synopsis, a list of subjective character comments and 'apart from that, the story works fine.'

An other writer paid handsomely for a series of consultations with a respected author of screenwriting books. Although he ended up with a formally impressive draft, the writer soon realised the editor had not addressed an obvious, major structural weakness in the screenplay (as an experienced industry friend later revealed after a free reading of the script).

If someone works from LA, it doesn't mean they will give you better results. An emerging writer paid an established American script consultant top rates for several months. The script didn't even get shortlisted in a program for beginning screenwriters (in which two of the scripts I worked on received a big wad of development cash).

THREE KILOS OF FREE ADVICE

The first three readers brave enough to have (parts of) their synopsis published, I will offer a free Story Diagnosis. If you believe your synopsis is ready-to-go, I'll focus on the document's style and selling power.

Same for your script: send me the first fifteen pages of your screenplay. If you allow me to publish excerpts online, I will give you detailed scene feedback.

Please don't send any documents yet. Just send me an email to express interest and I'll get in touch about the next step.

Now, read the really small print below.


SOME REALLY SMALL PRINT

Isn't there a risk of my story being stolen?

Yes, there is.

It happens rarely but you can't eliminate the risk. That is why you need to register your screenplay first. I prefer you send me a synopsis of a draft you have already written and registered. Ideas cannot be protected. Screenplays can.

Alternatively, you can always send me something you had abandoned because it didn't work and you want to know why it didn't. In this case it's more about the learning experience than about getting that specific project up.

Yada Yada Yada...

Recently a friend recommended I should teach a course on screen dialogue. I found this surprising as I am not an expert on dialogue. I am not a native English speaker and I most certainly lack a deep knowledge of vocabulary.

My main reason for not jumping into dialogue workshops: I often read great dialogue, but I have never received one spec script where the structure couldn't be improved.

Structure is my shtick.

There is still so much to learn in this area, and you can't find it all in the books. I told my friend I have only scratched the surface and I'll turn my attention to a new area once story and structure have revealed all their secrets.

I mentioned this conversation to one of my most respected clients. He thought his use of dialogue had improved significantly through our development sessions. His script is certainly going the right direction: The coverage from a mini-major was thorough and contained genuine praise. Anyhow, it started me thinking about how I approach dialogue.

Because many writers love dialogue so much, I will stray from my path and share five principles. I am sure there are other, more important rules, but these are the ones that spring to mind. If you go against any of them, you need to have a very good reason.

About dialogue:
1. It should contribute to subtext more than plot.
2. Its semantics should be perfect, not organic or defective.
3. Its grammar SHOULD be organic and defective.
4. Its rhythm should support the scene's rhythm.
5. It can be reflective, not reflexive.

There is one more secret rule I love, which I only give away to my students and clients. It's about that one specific scene where you can - and must - break almost every rules.

Each of these techniques is a challenge in itself and you must develop a process to be aware of it during your own editing. Great dialogue doesn't usually flow naturally from your pen. It is laboured, crafted and endlessly polished.

That is why often at the very end of your development, when you are tantalisingly close to the final draft, you will need to do a thorough 'dialogue pass' and make sure every line and every word hits the mark.

Inexperienced screenwriters have great trouble judging whether their dialogue really works. This is because of their own tastes, education, movie influences etc. Another reason why they will always need a pro to do a final polish of your work before you send it out, even if the story works.

It can be tremendously helpful to workshop your lines with actors before committing to a shooting script. Beware: inexperienced actors will almost always favour dialogue over subtext.

Oh, and I fully agree with Robert McKee that often the line of dialogue the writer is most proud of, should be cut. Because Tarantino and Woody Allen get away with it, doesn't mean you should push your luck.

BREAK IT DOWN

Right after learning the principles of structure, it will be hard to apply them to your own work immediately.

Better is to consolidate your understanding by applying it to films you know, by watching them and identifying the key turning points.

A breakdown in scenes or plot points is an excellent start. To help you with this, I will regularly publish examples from different genres.

My structural overviews are hardly definitive. They are often different from the views of people I regard very highly. That doesn't make either of them 'wrong'. I don't believe in 'formula' and the main concern is to find a process that helps you creating and critiquing a structure so it has the best chance in the market place.

On the other hand, they can often be improved and I welcome your input.

Now, a lot of work goes into these structure articles and I want to reward my clients and Premium Subscribers, who pay for my time. Therefore, these overviews will only be accessible to non-paying readers for a limited period of time. During this time, you can copy it for your own use, not distribute it in any way or for any purpose without my written consent.

So far I have published five analyses:

Assault on Precinct 13 (Original Version)
Michael Clayton
Ghost World
Terminator 2
The Shawshank Redemption

The first two have gone Premium already, the remaining three will too, at the time of publication of my next post. But more will follow, so keep watching this space.


WILL READ FOR MONEY

I filled my shopping trolley with $489 worth of groceries and at checkout I said:

"I want all for free: soon I'll have a big family to feed and you'll make so much money, it is worth getting my business now!"

Guess what: it didn't work.

--- (deeeeeep breath - preparing for loooong whinge) ---

Every f***ing week people email me asking to read their work - FOR FREE. They all believe they have written the latest blockbuster, indie comedy, crime caper, romcom, etc. You name it.

And they all really - really - want me to spend half a day or a day of my precious time reading their shit rather than earning a living or spending time with my three-year old son Baxter.

Guys: this is my job.

Do you ever go into work in the morning and tell your boss:

"Hey listen, today I'm just doing you a favour, don't pay me. I love my job SO much!!"

With the persistence of leeches on steroids these people try to make me believe I am ruining my chances of becoming a billionnaire producer if I don't read their stuff.

Some keep coming back. Day after day. Week after week. Year after year.

Ever heard of the expression "pushing s*** uphill"?

Mostly I just try to make them see the light and sell my services, because without professional help they don't stand a chance of ever getting read.

But sometimes it just drives me plain mad.

If these writers had done their research on who I am, they would have known my views on screenwriting are pasted all over my three web sites. These sites have decent rankings and show up whenever you google my name.

Interestingly, the pattern is quite common:
1. First they send a sloppy synopsis, which;
2. I reject.
3. Then they tell me the script is better than the synopsis.
4. I kindly explain I don't work like that.
5. They insist I should read the 120p. script.
6. I reiterate what I have explained before, but offer to read on a consultancy basis.
7. They insist by repeating exactly what they have said before, only LOUDER.
8. Etc. etc. etc.

Sometimes I give in.

And guess what: in the rare cases I can free up time to read ten pages or so and give them free feedback, people get offended.

Only yesterday I received a highly insulting email in response to what was a polite, professional - free of cost - assessment of (part of) a screenplay. You're not prepared to lose? Well, don't play.

Which brings me to the following, more positive consideration:

I am very proud to say I am one of the very few consultants around the world who is completely transparent about their approach, their knowledge and their fees. You can read two years worth of articles on story and screenwriting in this blog, in which I am 100% open about my views on the craft.

But, you know what? Some of these people are just not interested in screenwriting. They just want some money to get their film made.

Apologies if I start to sound like a cranky old bastard. True, I am one. But I don't want to sound like one.

So:


THE GOOD NEWS

Currently I am working with six smart, dedicated writers with promising but unfinished stories. They have committed to regular consultancy sessions over a period of four months or longer. Yesterday an existing client signed up for the Intensive Pack.

More than a dozen return clients book regular Step Outline sessions and over the past two years, more than a hundred satisfied clients have paid for one or more services to improve their skills.

The Story Department - Premium Ed. has subscribers from both Australia's East and West Coast and from overseas.

The Story Workshops have been endorsed by Screen Development Australia, The ACT and NSW Writers Centres, The International Film College, and recently also the Australian Writers Guild, with whom I'm working on a workshop in South Australia.

If you have been considering joining a workshop or hiring my services, perhaps now is the time to get your project finally on the rails!

And more good news:


HAPPY BLOGDAY

The Story Department is now officially toilet-trained.

I have been crapping on about structure for a full two years now. No fad. Can you believe that even with 24 months, we haven't even made it into the average life span of Technorati's TOP 100 blogs?

Slowly the world is getting to know The Story Department:
- We are listed on Scribomatic (two places up from UNK).
- We are being interviewed by The Digital Production Buzz.
- We'll soon be interviewed on IF Magazine.

Also coinciding with the second birthday, there is a lot of news to be shared about the Premium Ed. too. Here we go:

- Australian readers can now enjoy much faster browsing and download speeds, thanks to the mirror site, hosted in Melbourne.

- Telephone consultations can now be recorded and made available to clients as mp3 downloads. No more frantic note-taking during our creative discussions.

- Top-level clients now receive a personal, password-protected web page with documents related to their projects.


PREMIUM GIVEAWAY

I am giving away a free one-year subscription(*) to the Story Department - Premium Ed. for the first three people who subscribe to this free blog.

Just enter your email address at the top right of this page. You'll receive an email each time a new post is added to this blog, which shouldn't be more often than once every week or two on average.

The three winners will get:

- Premium Articles direct to your email inbox
- The Story Dept. - Basic Edition (this newsletter)
- 15% off Options One and/or Two
- Discounted rates to selected workshops

(* The prize does NOT include the free Story Diagnosis)

Good luck!

Karel